POST EXAM SYNDROME

Well, that's two years of studying wrapped up in the most important fourteen hours of my life.

There are no words to describe the feeling when the invigilator demands “pens down” for the very last time than sheer, utter relief. The last walk out of the exam hall is always the time for silent celebrations – or helpless cries depending on which end of the ‘how much of the paper did you understand’ scale you were on. Now the only thing left to do is wait for our dreaded results’, the day when all the tension building up to that moment is released, but then realising how much more significant you actually made it.

   Despite the last step to getting into university done and dusted with, I can’t help but feel a sense of too much freedom, I mean, what do I do with my life now? No more all-nighters, no more stressed phone calls to friends about a maths problem, no more study timetables, no more knowing exactly what I should be doing at exactly what time in the day. During those two years, you can’t help but be stuck in monotonous way of life, and once broken I end up not being able to start anything new and productive, even after waiting and anticipating for the end of that schedule. When no more deadlines are given, my motivation levels shut down drastically. So much for, “I will start this when I am free…” Every moment I am sucked into watching another TV episode, I feel like I’m wasting precious time.

And so, here is what I say to get back motivation:

1. Get a haircut  - I tend to get a drastic chop after leaving it to grow for a while in its untamed state. Definitely leaves a refreshing feeling on the shoulders.

2. Try out new things - e.g. walk a different route than usual

3. Rediscover old passions - the flare of excitement is critical to battle the energy slump

I have come to the conclusion that YouTube and all other video hosting websites are evil full-stop.

Forever 21 Knit Jumper // H & M Floral Shorts

A LESSON TO BE LEARNED

 

I must admit the whole photo-taking business is not a walk in the park for me, not least for my lack of knowledge of lighting, composition, or camera know-how. So, as I set up camera down on my tripod but eventually dragging my mum into the street to aid my photo-taking spectacle, I couldn't help but feel like my efforts would be a little far-fetched. All I can really do is laugh when the intention to make the imagery appear somewhat rugged but professional with an added street effect (how poignant, I know), quickly turned into 'lets just capture the outfit and forget the rest'.

Having deliberately not made much of an exhibition of myself in all my school career, it was a strange feeling to pose right in the eye of the public even if it was just standing in front of a garage door. I am just not used to all this attention! I must say however that it was liberating; a few weird looks here and a few giggles there from passers-by didn't phase me as I do feel that I've grown up from caring about what others think. And neither will the average person. Sure, they'll find amusement for point one percent of their day, but by the end, they won't have even the slightest recollection.

This was the ensemble I worked for a day out in London; leather as a barrier to the rain and baggy sweatpants as, not gonna lie, a substitute to pyjama bottoms because all I wanted to do was cocoon myself in my duvet. Since my friend was turning eighteen, we decided it would be a bright idea to visit a bar-slash-club on a Thursday night, can you believe. And yes, yes, although I know it is a conformity to pound the alcohol when one turns a milestone age, I was not exactly suitably dressed, especially when men in business suits rocked up. Speaking of being stared at, this was one perfect scenario. Whilst I did look like I belonged more to an airfield in the leather jacket than the London metropolitan scene, I was pretty much in my duvet the entire time - so all's well that ends well I guess!

A tip for London nightlife: be early for everything!

Vintage Leather Jacket // Warehouse Checked Shirt // Miss Selfridge Satin Trousers // River Island Sandals // Zara Textured Bag // Canon EOS 10QD Film Camera